BlueBadgeMojo.com

TPKE, baby!

Last summer my org had a huge offsite in alignment with the annual company meeting, during which we launched some new organizational services standards - which guide us in how we service our customers. To help cement these standards in our minds, a group of guys pulled together a fake boy band (ClickThru) and lip-synced to an awful boy band tune, creating a dance routine and a video. They then performed live on stage for us. It was hysterical, and I loved the idea of an organization theme song. But I hate boy band music. So I took a couple sound clips, removed all of the music (to get it past legal, the only thing that could remain were the voices), and recorded and remixed a more hip, cool version. Check it out. Download tpke_cbuck_redux.mp3

And then I went a little crazy, creating an industrial/goth version: Download tpke_cbuck_vs_nitzer_ebb.mp3

Pneumatic Capsule Pipelines on Campus

                       

Joel and I were returning to campus after engorging ourselves on tasty pho, and decided to take the back pathway to 36 and drive past all of the construction and get a firsthand view on the construction progress, and once again found ourselves discussing the obvious lack of corporate dialog around the company's (alleged) secret plans to build a vast underground transportation hub to link up the various Puget Sound buildings with the existing (speculation) tube system between campus and Bill's waterfront home. In fact, it is the lack of dialog and, in my opinion, utter absence of content around management's secret plans for a futuristic pod transportation system that make it obvious that pneumatic capsule pipelines are indeed being built underneath the campus. By not saying anything, they reveal everything.

For a brief history of the technology, you can take a look at Wikipedia.

One of the leading minds in the area of Pneumatic Capsule Pipelines (PCP), Mr. Tim Howgego, has spent the past decade working in transport economics and public transport development, and has created a fascinating website that documents the history and science behind this technology. He's also into World of Warcraft, big time. 

From his website:

Simple PCPs follow conventional fluid mechanics principles. Air is blown down and / or extracted from the pipeline, propelling the capsule along the pipe. Both ends of the pipeline are sealed during transport, allowing the air behind the capsule to be above atmospheric pressure, and / or air in front of the capsule to be below atmospheric pressure. Simple PCPs involve a limited number of capsules in the system at any one time (normally just one). This reflects the inefficiency of creating sufficient pressures to propel multiple capsules, and the difficulty in retrieving one capsule from the end of the pipeline while a second capsule was being propelled.

            
Diagram showing Carsten's theory as applied to a simple capsule pipeline system (Source: Based on Carstens).

Modern PCP large diameter systems utilise through flow booster pumps, also known as jet pump injectors. These create the pressure differentials required to propel multiple capsules through a pipeline, while allowing both terminals at atmospheric pressure. This is done by placing a booster pump midway along the pipeline, and designing it in such a way that capsules can pass through the pump.

Hey, with technical-looking diagrams and references to obscure theories, I'm convinced its all legit.

Of course, for me, the real motivation for seeing this dream come to fruition here on campus in the opportunity to wear an orange-colored muscle suit with a bald cap, which seems to be the required standard outfit for riding in any kind of futuristic device. Sort of like how aliens are always in gray or silver jumpsuits. I'm guessing it reduces chaffing during pod rides.

DL for BlueBadgeMojo

For those within the sacred walls of Microsoft, we now have a distribution list for Blue Badge Mojo. Just run a search on autogroup, and you'll find us...

Communal Segways: Displacing Pneumatic Tube Plans?

                             

Joel and I had lunch today (Japanese, if you must know) and were discussing some of our ideas for improving the gridlock problem on campus. Taking some learning from major metropolitan areas, where specially marked communal bicycles or automobiles are dispersed across an area for anyone in need, Joel came up with the idea of Microsoft Segways. You'd place a row of them in front of every building, and people would jump on and go. He pondered the cost of the current shuttle program, including vehicle cost and maintenance, fuel, and driver salaries compared to the much less expensive and much more hip segways.

My only concern, again looking to examples in San Francisco and other large cities who made similar attempts to provide shared transportation, is theft. What stops someone from just riding off with a Microsoft-branded segway? This could be easily remedied, we surmised, by rigging each segway with an anti-theft shock device and then building a massive "invisible fence" around the campus and the city of Redmond. I'm no accountant, but I have to believe that the cost savings of a couple hundred segways and the cost of the occasional life flight to evacuate a would-be thief who, due to a large electric charge, experiences cardiac arrest, would be huge.

Of course, I had to remind Joel that this concept would disrupt existing plans (ok, they're MY plans) for a giant system of pneumatic tubes inbetween all buildings, allowing employees to jump into a "pod" and rocket off toward their destination. Some minor safety issues to work out, but its otherwise a great idea.

I'm out.  http://buckleyplanet.typepad.com

Automatic Hand Sanitizing Door Handle

There is not enough Purell hand sanitizer in my world. I am not particular about the brand, but I am glad that Purell has gone ahead and tried to be a category-killer here.

When I exit the restroom, I am one of those who uses a paper towel to grab the handle. Yes, I know all about the studies that suggest I get more germs from the earpiece on my phone, that germs are everywhere, that a toilet seat has fewer germs than the inside of a typical human's mouth.

I don't care. I prefer to be irrational and over-cautious with this issue.

Why am I so worried about the handle on the door as I exit the restroom? Because I see how many people 'take care of business' and then exit without washing their hands. I don't need to get graphic to convey the simple fact that the excreta potentially lingering on their hands are transferred to the door handle.

In the interest of public safety, especially in the workfplace, BlueBadgeMojo.com introduces the AutoSantizer Door Handle (Patent Pending).

Here's what it looks like:

If there is an engineer who would like to undertake this project with BlueBadgeMojo.com, please post a comment, and we can take world health to a new level.

We need to protect those of us with the basic common sense to wash our hands after "TCOB" (as Elvis used to say).

Is this an over-zealous improvement? I think not.

John

http://blogs.msdn.com/johnrdurant

http://painjunkie.spaces.live.com

Efficiencies in Towel Metrics

As part of the expansion of this site, we're introducing a few new categories for your reading pleasure. The premise for this category -- Over-zealous Improvements -- is to share our thoughts on how to make life easier at Microsoft, how to improve the quality of the work environment, and, most of all, how to increase shareholder value. Er, yes, well...

Now that we're all on the same page, here are my latest ideas to improve Microsoft:

1. Track towels with RFID tags
   It makes perfect sense. After returning this wonderful benefit this summer, I got to thinking -- how efficiently are we using our towels? Are we using them wisely? My thought is that we should track excessive towel usage by "tagging" towels with small RFID (Radio Frequency ID) devices, combined with access and exit data captured from badges as employees use the parking garage locker facilities. They'd be embedded within the towels so you'd hardly notice them, and give the company the ability to reward employees who use this benefit wisely. Also, any "excessive" towel usage would show up on a monthly report sent to managers, and if you "inadvertently removed" (swiped) one of the towels, your cost center would get the bill. 
   
2. Re-brand the locker rooms, and use previously owned hotel towels
   My other towel idea would save us even more money. As employees travel, have them take towels from their hotels, and donate them to the locker rooms. The company would save money, and this could be accomplished slowly over time so as to not raise any suspicion with the major hotel chains. Of course, official company policy would be to deny any knowledge of such a plan, but think of the cost savings! To us, not the hotels. My re-branding idea is to keep towels from the same hotels grouped together, and then come up with some clever naming scheme to explain the embroidering. For example, instead of "MH" for Marriott Hotel, it could stand for our new tag line, "Microsoft....Hooray!" 
   
3. Track people with RFID tags
   My last idea today addresses a pet peeve of mine -- people who accept invitations to meetings but don't show up, and don't email you or keep their Outlook schedule updated. GPS devices can be bulky and expensive, and state law prohibits the company from neck or tooth implants, so they are out of the question. So my idea is to expand the company's use of low-cost, low-profile RFIDs by tagging the ears of employees, similar to the bovine technology already being used in the field. Sensors within each building would track access points throughout the campus for real-time data analysis and reporting. Powered by SQL Server, or course. I'd suggest building an Outlook add-on for this one. I think there might already be a SharePoint web part, but it's a 3rd party solution that has not yet been fully tested.

I'm going to give this some more thought this weekend and try to come up with some more helpful ideas.

I'm out.    http://buckleyplanet.typepad.com